Friday, April 19, 2024

Aaron Rodgers’ New Girlfriend Is An Actual, Honest To God Witch

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Everybody knows the saying, “You can’t make this stuff up.” That has become a regular occurrence with Aaron Rodgers these days. Just when it seems like the man can’t possibly get any weirder, he finds a way to surprise you. It started with the alienation of his family years ago. Then it was dating Danica Patrick. Last year, his power play threatened a holdout that got the Green Bay Packers to pay through the nose to keep him. Then comes his claiming he was vaccinated when he actually wasn’t. The guy has been a one-person reality TV show.

Now he’s taken things to another level. Not long after breaking up with movie star fiancee Shailene Woodley, Rodgers has found a new girlfriend. Her name is Blu of Earth. She is a witch. No, seriously. According to Side Action Sports News, she classifies herself as a witch and a medicine woman. When listening to her description, the technical term that comes to mind is “hippie.”

“It seems like yesterday when Aaron was professing his love and gratitude to his fiancé Shailene Woodley. Aaron has rebounded once again. The timeline is a little fuzzy on this one! She calls herself Blu of Earth. Blu changed her name from her birth name, Charlotte Brereton. Blu describes herself as a witch, claims she’s a medicine woman (she has a Bachelor in Broadcast Communication) and is into psychedelic drugs. This should be good says our source.”

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Aaron Rodgers is going to vanish into the wilderness after football.

That is at least what it feels like watching the progression of his life over the past few years. The guy is already somewhat of a recluse. He does the usual charity work, but it feels like he’s getting more and more into the nature-loving scene when it comes to personal preferences. Since he can’t seem to hold a relationship in modern society, he’s apparently opted for someone more “out there.”

Here is hoping Blu of Earth casts a spell on him that might diminish his effectiveness on Sundays so he’ll retire faster. That or slip him some psychedelics so he’ll think Bears defenders look like Packers receivers. Every man is entitled to his preferences regarding love, but Aaron Rodgers makes it so easy to laugh sometimes. He’s reached a point where all one can do is wonder what he’ll do next.

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David
Jun 9, 2022 7:18 am

So he's part of a psychedelic Cult now. Good to know. As you mentioned: you can't make this stuff up.

KC in Hawaii
KC in Hawaii
Jun 8, 2022 11:14 pm

Maybe he'll ask the defense to meditate instead of sacking him.

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